Something is missing

Something is missing today from my life. I feel the urge to speak about it but have no one to speak to. I am surrounded by so many people and yet I dont trust any one of them to speak about me so freely. It might sound a bit hypocritic but arent we all in someway wearing a visage infront of all which opens up only infront of selected few. Well I think its the fear of getting back stabbed that makes us do so ore react in this manner. Well there has been a lot of changes in my life very recently and I tend to think that what I was comfortable with in the past is not the same now. I now have a different definition of comfort and luxury. I think my life is prefect now I am financially balanced for the 1st time in my life this has happened though. I ment my work like here. I think I am all set to settle down and nothing is stopping me from doing so expect one thing and I am afraid I wont be able to discuss that one thing with any one. Cause the one I have lost all communication with the person I want to talk to. I dono if its just me who feels this way and every one else feel that is the the right thing to happpen. I have no reason to be unhappy yet I am gloomy and I rely hate that part of my life. I was so happy in life a few moments ago. By moments I ment time in school till I reached colg. I was so happy to get all the freedom and njoy a sip of beer and a fag would give all the happiness. I think life will get simpler if I think of it that way but then I rely missed being luved and cared by someone special. Is this something that was ment to happen or I just stumbled into it. I dono how can people be so insensitive to things like things I mean they also went through the same things when they were our age. I think will take off now manager is hosting a meeting for migration.


Tushar

New Phase in Bangalore

Things have started to move the way I always wished. I dono ow did I manage it so early in my work career. My best guess will be that 3 years is a long time in career. Well I have been working with this new firm for the last 3 months now and to tell the truth I have loved every moment of it. Rite when I enter the office I am at peace as if I have not come to work but that I have come to work (pun intended). The very moment I feel its starting to get monotonic, and by that I don't mean just work (even the fun here is so straneous sometimes) ; there is always something interesting and new that will happen to break the chill. I have been here for just over 3 months and I have learnt more than I could have done in an year. I have migrated servers, conducted training, provided on call support, played cricket, witnessed 3 big functions, ogled at chiks in wrk place, worked on oracle and wt not. Done all the things I wanted to and when I wanted to without having to answer the 'WHY' . I dd try my luck to return to kol with some new firm but then didnt get the interview call. But that didnt make me low cause I know things will happen just when I want them to happen badly. Life's treating me well and now the time has finally come when I will have to choose some one to settle down. I havn't given it much of a thoght but I am sure things will happen pretty soon.


Tushar